Page 7 - Scene Magazine January 2024 4901

The Way I’ve Scene I
t
BY DENISE POYER
deadline. I am pretty sure when I finally pressed the send button, Rick DeRuiter and Sherii Sherban breathed a collective sigh of relief, because they did not end up having to send my “friendly remind- er” yet again. Oops! I’m sorry Ricky. Secondly, I am a little concerned about the sketchy intentions of This Winter.
I think she will turn out to be the guest that wouldn’t leave, and I hate gray.
I am a bit fickle, because I do love snow but really only in December... which is stupid because most of that month is technically still fall, and despite a couple of pretty snow days that made me smile near Christmas- time, most of that month mesmerized the rest of you with temperatures that had it feeling a lot like early June. The Beautiful Beau has not a single shred of love for snow and prefers instead the monochromatic splendor of fifty shades of gray and temps that are anything above freezing. Is drizzle a color? I, on the other hand, far prefer snow this time of year – but of course
In truth, for me anyway, week after week of gloomy skies is minor compared to the endlessness of the mud and mole season. Ugh. My terriers, Owen and Ol- ive, who by nature are avid vermin hunt- ers, are having the time of their lives!
I looked out the window the other day, and The Boy One was head and shoul- ders-deep in the middle of the back yard. Filthy? Why yes, he certainly was. When I finally caught his attention, he stopped moving his little wet, dirt-caked feet
for just a nanosecond and looked at me. Deaf since birth, he cocked his head and
The thing is, no matter how you dice it This Winter has commitment issues. She needs to come and stay a while
or skip this year altogether. I could probably blame my weather woes on stupid dogs and vermin, but I firmly believe This Winter is messing with me and if my calculations are correct, at the rate she is going, I only have about 117 months left to wash dogs, shovel late season snow, and roll my eyes before she finally goes on her merry way. Sheesh! Oh hey! It’s snowing! Mich- igan really is quite pretty! I just love this, don’t you?
I think I need
to be very up
front about two things here. First, just for the sake
of transparency,
I submitted this column NINE days past the optimal
Can We Get On With It Already?
So here it is early January, and though December’s winter solstice ushered in what are alleged to be diminishing hours of darkness, I feel like I am in hour number two-hun- dred-eleventy-two-thousand of sunless rain-soaked drab. El Nino is being an El Stinkerpot. I am sure she thinks she is funny, but she most certainly is not. I love December snow and kind of like it all the way through February. Heck, I can even, albeit barely, tolerate it in March, but April snow can kiss my left pinky toe. I want no part of that, but you just know at the rate we are going, that’s exactly what will happen. This Winter, who is evidently a late bloom- er, is being gentle and neighborly now so she can be ugly later.
with one silenced ear standing straight up and the other folded neatly, I could swear he grinned at me before returning to his enthusiastic excavation. I said stuff he could not hear, that Scene Magazine cannot print, and played Dodge Poo all the way out to scoop him up (without getting myself dirty) for yet another bath. Olive, who thinks she is Jackson Russell Pollock, had darted out the door with me, loaded her own paws with some soggy yard too and in record time, effortlessly created a muddy masterpiece on my kitchen floor. Let us not discuss the Jack Russell version of Wack-a-Mole out by the birdfeeders or worse yet, the poor ugly thing that evidently met his maker in the dog bed UNDER my craft table, because it makes me gag. Nothing stinks like a dead rodent!
with clear sidewalks, clear roads, and lots of sun.
EDUCATION ISSUE I SCENE 4901 7